Weaponized love is not gender-specific, though it often follows patriarchal scripts.
It operates by exploiting our most sacred human need: to belong. It sounds like this (actual text messages from Allan in 2024):
“Since the day I met you,our connection is even beyond ourselves. I love you and I cherish and relish all of your being.”
“I always felt it and so to this day, as well as I love you since the very first time I saw you to this day, with an indescribable strength and passion.”
“I am grateful for your love and kindness. I feel you, I always have. I love you, regardless of time and distance, you are with me and I am with you, darling.”
“You are so important and valuable to me, beyond what I can express. I love you deeply and passionately.”
The messages all look like a normal love affair, right?
The author, Allan Alexander Amador Cervantes, was intimately involved with another woman at the time he sent these messages. Additionally, at this time, he was leading a third elderly woman to believe she was his love interest. And also inviting two other elderly woman on dates.
This is why it is important to view domestic violence in context. As stand alone messages, there is no alarm in an established trusting relationship. In context, we see a psychopathology and serious harm to the target.
Allan Amador Cervantes
The next step follows the typical abuse cycle and involves devaluation and discard. See Pattern Evidence & Case Studyfor live example.
Idealization and devaluation form the oscillating core of narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), manifesting as “splitting”—a primitive defense where the other is all-good or all-bad. In NPD, idealization serves self-aggrandizement: the partner is “love-bombed” with excessive praise and mirroring to secure narcissistic supply, creating an addictive pedestal. The narcissist flips from intense expressions of love to devaluation, weaponizing contempt, silence, and attachment to gain superiority, as these tactics inherently destabilize his victim by causing oxytocin and dopamine withdrawal symptoms, fostering dependency.
Devaluation erupts abruptly: ghosting enforces erasure, lying distorts reality (gaslighting). In NPD, the pivot often stems from narcissistic injury.
This swing is not mere moodiness but a structural fracture in self-cohesion. Narcissist then point to the victim as “unstable” and assert himself as the more stable, knowing partner. Unbeknownst to most narcississt, however, is that power and control experts transparently understand this play and it is well documented in scholarly archives.
Allan Amador Cervantes claims she told him “since I refuse to talk to her, I was going to suffer the consequences.”
The full response to Allan’s character abusive text message, shown below, can be found at Pattern Evidence & Case Record.
Allan Alexander Amador Cervantes
Delineation:
1) The fear of suffering is self-referential
Allan does not talk about harm done to her. Allan talks about harm that could be done to him.
That tells you his primary mental focus is personal threat, not guilt or empathy.
2)Allan’s suffering is conceptualized as a punishment for not complying
In his frame: His crime is not rape or abandonment. His crime is not giving her continued access or attention.
This is a narcissistic reframing: “Her pain is not real. My pain is the real pain, caused by her.”
3) Allan implies his suffering is inflicted
Not emerging from his own choices. Not emerging from the original wrongdoing. It is “done to him.”
That is a self-victim narrative. It removes agency. It removes accountability.
4) That phrasing reveals his psychology
A. Allan feels persecuted B. Allan cannot imagine her as a legitimate victim C. Allan interprets exposure as “suffering” imposed on him
This is the inversion move.
Allan cannot conceptualize that the consequences he fears flow from his own behavior (rape, deception, lying, triangulation). His mind must externalize suffering as something a woman is doing to him.
This is textbook identity-preservation. If Allan admits “I harmed someone,” his identity collapses.
So he narrates: “She wants to make me suffer.” Because psychologically, that is the only version he can survive.
Allan alleges they want HIS financial support! Allan’s claim reflects an absurd view of reality, radically misaligned with the evidence he himself presents.
The truth speaks: Allan prostitutes himself to elderly American women. The motive is clear.
Poverty is not funny. Poverty in places like La Paz is heartbreaking. Many people in La Paz told me the truth: opportunity is extremely small. People work hard, for very low pay, and most will never escape their situation. When we see a poor Mexican man, age 44, romantically chasing women 30 or 35 years older, this behavior does not come from love. It comes from desperation, and lack of opportunity.
However, the problem becomes serious when deception begins. Men like Allan do not show the truth. Allan posts images standing next to someone else’s car or home. Allan speaks in vague language to make the public think he is some swag dude traveling the world. Allan hides the fact that his lifestyle is not his own, but that of an older woman. His entire online image is a false identity, down to the strong arm emoji.
Allan is not harmless. Allan is a fraud. Allan and men like him are not asking for charity. They are creating a false self in order to trap a woman with more resources. They want a green card, housing, money, or a way out.
He contributes a little in the beginning until his credit card maxes out. Then the woman pays the cost. Allan hopes to gain freedom.
Allan Amador Cervantes
Women must recognize this pattern and protect themselves. The danger is not only financial loss. The danger is the emotional impact of deeply intimate deception.
In the image below, we have Allan’s social media posts at Pamela Sue Martin’s ranch. And without a touch of editing, we present his true home, his true view.
The disparity between his real life and the life he presents and is chasing is surreal.
When a man, such as Allan Alexander Amador Cervantes, lies to a woman to get sex, money, housing, travel, or immigration advantage, he is committing fraud. He is gaining valuable things from her under false terms. He is presenting himself as something he is not. He promises things, including love, he never intends to give. This is not “playing around.” This is not romance. This is not misunderstanding. This is deliberate deception for personal gain.
Allan Amador Cervantes
Fraud in business is punished. Fraud in banking is punished. Fraud in government documents is punished. Yet when fraud happens in intimate relationships, people tend to ignore the financial and emotional loss. They call it “bad breakup.” They call it “dating mistake.” But it is the same category of harm. A woman gives time, money, gifts, care, and sex based on false information. He receives profit. She receives loss. That is the definition of fraud.
Allan Alexander Amador Cervantes is a fraud.
Calling it “love” does not make it less criminal. Calling it “relationship issues” does not make it less serious. Women are targeted every day by men like Allan who want financial access without effort.
Allan grooms victims with fake romance. Allan manipulates women to give resources they would never give if they knew the truth.
This is fraud, and society needs to treat it as fraud, because it steals from women in every dimension of their lives.
During the Covid pandemic, Sophie—a divorced mother with disabilities, 16 years older than Allan—moved from California to La Paz. She sought relief from lockdowns, rehabilitation through swimming the Sea of Cortez, and opportunities to volunteer for social causes.
Allan targets disabled woman trying to rehabilitate in Sea of Cortez
Facebook suggested Allan as a connection. His public profile presented him as a university rector and community figure. Sophie reached out, believing he could direct her toward volunteer opportunities. From the beginning, her intention was clear: service to the community, not romance.
But Allan’s response was not professional. By their second meeting, he invaded her personal space, he followed her home without consent, and he lied about where he lived. Sophie rejected him, but Allan pressed forward, promising introductions to volunteer opportunities. Soon he was swimming beside her, camping with her, dining with her.
For nine months, Allan concealed the truth about his living situation. He claimed to own a house being remodeled, managed by his brother, Christopher. In reality, he owns no property and he lives in his mother’s attic. When exposed, he said Sophie could not visit him at his mother’s house because his mother dislikes visitors. Witnesses confirm those excuses are false. Years later, having forgotten his lie, Allan also inadvertently confirmed this is false.
The deception served a purpose: to mask his poverty and to position Sophie’s luxury penthouse as a free lover’s pad.
This pattern continued. Allan feigned wealth, spoke of his substantial savings and investments, but let Sophie pay for dinners, hotels, and travel. When inside her penthouse overlooking the Mogote, he acted like a kept man—giving orders to staff, sweeping floors, lingering on the sofa, and “forgetting” personal items when he left so he would have to return. He offered love without action, commitment without cost. Un gigoló.
The financial imbalance grew clearer when Allan visited Sophie in California. He spoke of building a life together but expected her to fund it. He promised love and fidelity. Instead, he cultivated simultaneous relationships with other women, concealing them through lies: “I lost my phone,” “I am busy with politics,” “there’s no reception in Todos Santos,” “Kenno is sick.” He disappeared for weekends and holidays using his family as alibis while reassuring Sophie of his love.
When Sophie asked him before moving permanently to La Paz—risking her career, finances, and leaving family behind—he swore:
“I absolutely want you here with me.”
She drove a thousand miles across the desert on that promise, investing thousands of dollars, only to arrive to chaos. Allan was already entangled with Jody Waterman, conducting a public, sexually charged online relationship. He was secretly pursuing Pamela Sue Martin in Todos Santos and Idaho. And he was chasing pussy of all ages and nationalities, including a minor, all while keeping Sophie as his sexual doormat and financial safety net.
Suddenly, in summer 2023, Allan claimed his “rich cousin in Washington” had paid his first class expenses to Washington to help his cousin’s child.
I want to reiterate: Allan used not just this child in his lies, but also his minor nephews on other occasions.
In reality, this “rich cousin” was Pamela Sue Martin, thirty years his senior. Allan raved about her wealth and how “he” was paying for everything: dinners, flights, and all other travel expenses. The elaborate lie revealed the indisputable Mexican-gigolo strategy:
Allan targets older, wealthier women, using deceit to gain sexual access and financial benefits.
Allan’s deceit-for-sex career carries a critical legal implication: Idaho’s rape laws provide for prosectution for Artifice, Pretense, or Concealment and California law provides similar protections.
Un Gigoló Méxicano, Estafador Extraordinario
Family Complicity
Allan did not act alone. His family enables him. His mother knew he was traveling to various US states to spend time with different wealthy women old enough to be his mother.
Maria Elena cannot claim ignorance of his motives. Allan’s own words implicate his brother Christopher and sister-in-law Fernanda, who chauffeured him to airports. Allan further confided that Fernanda coached him on how to build trust and intimacy with these women.
The deception was not hidden from family; it was facilitated.
Family must consider their their own position, their own family standing, and draw a clear line between Allan’s disgrace and their households:
Protege a tu propia familia: tu matrimonio, tus hijos, la reputación de tu hogar.
No te dejes atrapar por la falsedad de Allan.
Elimina la contaminación: asegúrate de que tu rama del árbol genealógico no se vea mancillada por el engaño y la deshonra de Allan.
Allan lied for sex. He lied for money. He lied when truth would have served him better.
The lies multiplied beyond what one interview can contain. Sophie became ill under the weight of Allan’s chaos. She told him she was breaking down. Instead of easing the harm, Allan escalated it—feigning empathy while deepening betrayal. She left La Paz six months later, burdened with all the costs of migration, relocation, and remigration, while Allan continued to whisper promises: “I love you more than you know. I am coming soon to be with you. Kenno is sick.”
Kenno, Allan’s brother, was indeed sick. But Allan’s cruelty had nothing to do with that reality. Kenno was simply another alibi to cloak Allan’s relationships with other women.
In the end, Sophie received a single message that opened the floodgates of truth.
The pattern is undeniable: Allan lied for sex, lied for money, lied when truth would have served him better. His deceit is not incidental—it is pathological.
And his family stands by him, complicit in the harm.
In the below image, a young lady rightfully feels compelled to threaten Allan with violence for his ongoing inappropriate contact with her…three months after he told her mother he loved her…in a text message…one day after Allan was photographed in bed with Sophie.
Having trouble keeping track of Allan’s poor personal boundaries? There’s plenty more to see if you care to vomit.
“Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to your neighbor, for we are all members of one body.” Ephesians 4:25 (NIV)
When one supply source threatens exposure, run to the other supply source and secure it.
She is the most vulnerable to the exact deception pattern outlined in Allan’s psychological profile.
Allan is actively bonding tighter to prevent losing her. She is in the jurisdiction where his deceptive sexual behavior is criminal. Silence protects him, not her.
He will repeat the same abuse cycle until she learns the truth and/or she is harmed.
“Patterns suggest efforts calculated to maintain influence, risking destabilization of romantic partners.”
The first time someone told me that Allan is a liar, a user, and an abuser of women, I was incensed. Outraged! Furious.
I responded to that woman with scathing rebuke.
The Second Time
The second time someone told me that Allan was abusing women, I was angry. I denied it. It couldn’t be true. He is so charming and polite.
The Third Time
The third time someone told me that Allan was abusing women, I paused. I asked Allan about it. The idea was ridiculous, he said. “She’s a jealous woman, she’s crazy,” he told me.
The Fourth Time
The fourth time someone told me that Allan was abusing women, I investigated. I was deeply concerned by the evidence I found. I confronted him. He scoffed. I will never forget that smirk on his face.
The Fifth Time
The fifth time someone told me that Allan was abusing women, I investigated again. Allan was lying to me.
The Reign of Hell Began
I confronted him. He lied. I confronted him again. He lied again. I confronted him again. He created total destruction and chaos while simultaneously kissing me, telling me he loved me, and making love to me.
I Left Him
He pursued me again. Still avoiding the truth.
I left him again.
I Forgave Him
I should not have.
I wasn’t the only one he was lying to.
I wasn’t special. I wasn’t loved. This wasn’t the “Once in a Lifetime Love” we whispered about.
I was someone he was using because he needed admiration and attention. A ticket to the USA. That’s all.
Allan Sexually Violated Me.
The lies. The lies were emotional fraud.
But bringing someone else’s sexual energies into my bed, into my womb. Without my permission. He desecrated me.
idealization — emotional fraud & love bombing: I love you more than you know and I can’t wait to build memories together; our connection is even beyond ourselves. I cherish and relish all of your being; the purest feeling for one another; I always felt it; I love you since the very first time I saw you with an indescribable strength and passion; I am grateful for your love and kindness. I love you, regardless time and distance you are with me and I am with you, darling.; You are so important and valuable to me, beyond I can express. I love you deeply and passionately; We are building strong and deep memories, as well as pages in our lives. All I need and want is you❤️🔥; I am fully grateful for having found each other; how important you are in my life and all what you brought to me since I saw you that first time. You are my once in a lifetime.The intensity of my feelings for you is something never experienced before, the force that attracts me to you is so deep, authentic, and strong that stands on its own feet; I don’t want to be apart from you. You can count on me and I can rely on you for whatsoever. We were as two persons sharing the most valuable resources we have that are time and affection, and what I want always to be the foundation of our relationship no matter how it is named, expressed or lived, while HONEST. The best days of my life and it is because you were there, with me, renewing my heart and giving me what you are in the most pure sense of your existence. I LOVE YOU, I really mean it.
devaluing — lies, triangulation, gaslighting (You cannot come with me; I was working; I need to cancel our weekend plans -my brother needs me to drive him to Todos Santos; my nephews want me to take them to dinner; I lost my phone in Todos Santos over the weekend so I couldn’t call/text; my mother is planning dinner, she doesn’t like people so you are not invited; an important political figure is in town so I need to cancel weekend plans; I’m translating for court at night; I am in Washington (Idaho) with my cousin (Pamela Sue Martin), I will call you tomorrow, I will call you later, how dare you confront me about such a thing; stop asking me “what time!”; I’m not talking to you about how I feel!)
discarding — click
Shock. Chaos. Confusion.
Letter Received
Your boyfriend is sleeping with another woman. Here’s proof.
I could have Handled the Truth
“I don’t love you, I don’t want to be with you” would have been good enough for me. I could have walked away years sooner with dignity. With my sacred womb in tact.
Living with Anger
Now. I am angry at myself for overlooking the obvious.
Angry at myself for forgiving him.
Angry at myself for trusting his words when he said, “I want you here with me.”
Angry at myself for not realizing it was all about the money and the USA. It wasn’t about me.
I make no apologies for shining light on this truth.
I Hope No One Else Gets Hurt
His public persona is a fascinating study in the art of deception.
People want to believe what they see.
4000 Fake Followers
Thank You God
I’m deeply grateful for your gifts.
Violence in La Paz, Baja Califronia Sur
Note on Transparency: In the interest of accuracy and fairness, We will publish any credible counter-narrative or evidence Allan Alexander Amador Cervantes wishes to provide in response to the information on this site. As of the date of this publication, he has not requested removal or correction of any content.
Abusers often project a public persona of strength and confidence to mask deep-seated insecurities, a behavior that becomes more pronounced under public scrutiny. This curated image—whether through charm, dominance, or displays of control—serves as a shield to hide vulnerabilities. In private, their insecurity may manifest as manipulation or aggression to maintain power over others, but in public, they double down on this “strong & happy” facade to deflect criticism or exposure. This dynamic is rooted in their fear of being seen as inadequate, driving them to craft an image that demands admiration rather than authenticity.
“Va a mi gym y se clava mirando a las morras como si fuera deporte. La neta, cómo nos echa ojo está bien creepy. Le decimos de broma ‘el galán’, pero la verdad nos da mala vibra, entonces tratamos de andar en bola cuando está por ahí. No es normal.” –Afectada
Social Media Overcompensation for Fragile Pride.
The intensification of this behavior under scrutiny often stems from an abuser’s need to maintain control over their narrative. When challenged or exposed, their insecurity fuels defensive tactics like exaggerated displays of confidence to preserve their carefully constructed persona. For example, an abuser might respond to criticism with grandiose boasts or public displays of authority to reassert dominance and suppress doubts about their character. This pattern not only protects their fragile self-image but also manipulates how others perceive them, making it harder for their abusive behavior to be recognized or addressed.
Abuse survivors must understand this behavior to recognize the disconnect between an abuser’s public image and their private actions. Awareness empowers survivors to break free from the manipulation, rebuild trust in their own perceptions, and seek support without being swayed by the abuser’s carefully crafted persona. By understanding this dynamic, survivors can better navigate their healing journey and protect themselves from further harm.
Awkward attempts at public displays of normalcy or success
Each new “I’m strong” post looks like damage control. The more he fights to maintain control of his image, the more the performance exposes his weakness.
He has no real path to recover his image without confronting the truth — and he won’t. Particularly as he surrounds himself with enablers rather than those who help him accept responsibility and transform for the betterment of self, his victims, and his community.
For Survivors We know the journey from shock to denial to realization to anger to recovery. If you need support along your journey, we are committed to protecting your identity. Reach out to us by email.
Note on Transparency: In the interest of accuracy and fairness, We will publish any credible counter-narrative or evidence Allan Alexander Amador Cervantes wishes to provide in response to the information on this site. As of the date of this publication, he has not requested removal or correction of any content.
When public image is under threat, abusive personalities often pivot into “wholesome overload” — flooding social media with symbols of innocence, purity, and moral authority. Pets. Bible verses. Family rhetoric.
This is not harmless. It is calculated. The performance says, “Trust me. I am gentle, safe, and righteous.” Meanwhile, the masked persona remains unchanged — sometimes existing in plain sight on other platforms.
Kittens to Kinks
This week offered a textbook example: one account displaying images crafted to inspire trust; another filled with connections to female sexual objectification. This contrast is not accidental. Contradiction is the strategy. It keeps victims doubting their own instincts, asking themselves, “Could someone so kind really be harmful?”
The mask on Instagram: A symbol of gentleness and virtue, chosen to evoke trust and affection.
The reality on X: Public alignment with content built on female sexual objectification.
Two platforms. Two stories. One truth.
We love adorable black kittens as much as anyone else. While we strongly encourage pets as a way to experience love, we are just as strongly concerned that carefully curated public imagery is an extension of the double-life playbook: Soft fur in public, hard-core in private.
If Allan has a new kitten, we wish he and the kitten all the best. But we fear the animal could be used as a prop in efforts to curate a more likable public image.
Survivors deserve truth, safety, and dignity. If you have experienced emotional, spiritual, or relational abuse, our Survivor Support Team is here to listen, believe you, and connect you with resources to rebuild your life. Contact us in complete confidentiality.
Pornography La Paz Baja California Sur Mexico
Note on Transparency: In the interest of accuracy and fairness, We will publish any credible counter-narrative or evidence Allan Alexander Amador Cervantes wishes to provide in response to the information on this site. As of the date of this publication, he has not requested removal or correction of any content.
