Later, I scrolled through the things people were saying about him online. Other women had come forward with similar stories. The pattern was so clear it was almost boring: the flattery, the future-faking, the constant triangulation to keep everyone insecure and addicted.
I pity Pamela. I recognize the anxious attachment in every performative comment. I had lived it too.
He lied to both of us with the same mouth.
Allan abuses with such grace that it takes an expert to decode it. And the expert’s expertise is honed in the process of analysis.
I told him, “You are abusive. You are abusing me.”
He looked down, as he always does when he wants to deflect responsibility, and muttered, “No. Not abusive.”
Yes, darling. Abusive. The evidence is overwhelming. Just because someone is tolerating the abuse does not make you less abusive.
Allan Alexander Amador Cervantes is the worst kind of monster: so kind and flattering to your face while inserting a knife in your back.
If you are in the same situation, you are not crazy. You are not alone.